Losing control and being okay; vulnerability and intimacy If you are reading these in order, you will know that last column I wrote about watching others suffer and being okay with it. This column is about losing control and being okay with it. Similar? Yes. Same? No. Watching someone else go through a tough time…
Tag: emotions
Distress Tolerance (part IV)
Watching Others in Distress Last column I promised that I would write (in this column) about the importance of watching other people tolerate their own distress. If you read this series in order, it makes a lot of sense because the last installment spent considerable time discussing invalidation or, put another way, bailing people out…
Distress Tolerance (part I)
I have said before (in my company podcast – Noggin Notes) that emotions can be described metaphorically as a wave. They have a beginning, a middle, and an end. As such, they are temporary and typically they last no longer than a few seconds. Learning to ride this metaphorical wave is critical for dealing with…
Ask Mr. Emotions: Shame and Guilt
We live in a society that has made shame and guilt undesirable. From the perspective of not wanting to experience discomfort, that makes sense. We all want to live in as much comfort and ease as possible. However, from a neurological, psychological, physiological, and sociological perspective, avoiding shame and guilt is a very dangerous premise….
Everyday Dad / Disneyland Dad
To a certain extent, every parent (and parenting team) has to wrestle with being the “cool” parent or the “strict” parent. I’ve seen plenty of parents who take pride in being the disciplinarian, the rule maker and enforcer, all the while knowing that their partner is relieved (in a sense) of that side of the…
Reno Dads Podcast Episode 4: Kylee’s Wish with Kehl LeSourd
Kylee’s Wish: A Story of Hope and Resilience In this episode, the Reno Dads sit down with Kehl LeSourd, a dad who inspires us with his and his family’s story of resilience in the face of some very challenging circumstances. Kehl is the father of Kylee LeSourd (who, at age 7, was diagnosed with brain cancer)….
Fatherhood Has Turned Me into a Crying Sap
Last month, I hired a photographer to take family photos. My wife and I have an 8-month old daughter and very few pictures on the wall to show for it. The photog, David Calvert, is a buddy who also shot our wedding. David sent me a text to let me know that the photos would be done…
Talking To Your Kids about September 11th
“Never Forget” seems to be getting difficult for us, as a people, for an event now 16 years passed. We just don’t talk about it the same way. We should, but we don’t. The incredible emotions of anger, fear, confusion, and even love for our fellow citizens has faded. We certainly haven’t forgotten, but we…
Real Man
Being a real man is hard. First off, can anyone even define what that means? So many forces tug at us to place labels, then once we think we have settled on something reasonable, another force makes us question that. Someone wiser than I once said, “To define is to confine,” meaning that if we…
Help Me Coach Your Kids
I am blessed with the opportunity to share some of my time with your children as a coach. I love to work on technique, to be a positive influence on their day, and watch them grow and develop over time due to hard work and perseverance. I just have one request: help me coach your…
Developing Emotional Resilience
“It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men.” – Frederick Douglas Seems simple enough, right? I read a parenting book, 21 Mistakes Parent’s Make, that began a chapter with Douglas’ quote as he went on to say that a mistake many parents make is that they raise children and not adults….