I Envy the Man with a Man Bun

“There’s many a man hath more hair than wit.” -Shakespeare

The man bun has quite the bad rap. I say to each his own, and if you can pull it off better than the new Ken doll, then you go girl! Hold on. Don’t get upset at me just yet as I’m an equal opportunist – the only female to pull off any kind of bun was Carrie Fisher. Sorry, I’m just not a fan of buns. <queue the internal Sir Mix-a-Lot music>

So, why is this Reno Dad even writing about this hair style that shouldn’t be worn by anyone? Because I envy the man with a man bun.

I consider myself an outgoing person and I still have all of my hair (though I’m on the express train to Silver Fox), but there’s no way I could ever pull off that look. Nor do I think I’d want the added attention or stigma that comes along with it. I’ll blame it on my age. Most guys I see that can pull off the man bun are closer to 20.

If I had known in college that I’d end up the father of 2 girls, I would’ve grown my hair out and rocked every long hairstyle. The first time I was left to get my oldest ready for school, I played the “daddy tried” card. Your wife will understand this double standard that still exists in our culture – mommy is judged harshly if their little girl isn’t completely put together when she drops them off for school. Meanwhile, if daddy is able to get their little girl to school in one piece, there is a small parade planned for him by pick up.

I’m going to pause here to re-affirm that this is one reason Reno Dads was started. We want to show that the word dad is a verb; we want to shed light on the double standard that exist between being a mother and being a father; we are active in our children’s lives. This paradigm shift can only occur if there’s a conversation.

But until that iceberg sized paradigm begins to move, I am going to use it to my advantage while I figure out how the hell to pull off a simple, damn ponytail. There’s always hair that doesn’t make it into the ponytail! And it’s never the same hair or even on the same side of her head; sometimes it’s too loose or too tight or the tie breaks or it’s the wrong tie. A ponytail is supposed to be the easiest hairstyle, right?

What’s that? You want a braid? A fishy-tail? Anna or Elsa hair? Poppy hair? pig tails? a twisted ponytail? an up do? a double twist back? a curly q? Fuck it, we’re late. You’ll be lucky to have a brush run through your hair this morning. My daughter doesn’t care. Four-year-olds aren’t as judgy as the girls in middle school are. And by the time my daughter is that old, she’ll have learned her own style and how to do her own hair. In any case, I can see why Daddy Daughter Hair Factory exists. I need to find a local hairstylist willing to do some workshops for us fathers with daughters that are simply clueless about hair. Who’s with me?

 

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